Feeling Defeated After 18 Years in the Hobby

[Freddie83]

went through same Pretty much losing everything and walking in to house with the smell I knew exactly what had happened before I’d even set eyes on tank,was gut wrenching,took some time out and then thought I love this hobby love the buzz of it had a trip to states and a few good lfs and set up again on my return home and so glad I did hang on in there and get back into it,good luck

I know exactly what smell you are talking about. It's crazy how quickly the entire situation deteriorated. Even after I had power restored and did a water change + replaced carbon, corals have kept on dying.

 

[Freddie83]

I’m sorry this happened, and I can understand the helpless feeling that you may be going through, I’ve had a couple of crashes myself in the past. 18 years is a long time in reefing. If it were me, I’d evaluate if the things I missed out on because of the tank are now more important than having one. In other words, has your lifestyle changed to where it would be more desirable to travel or take up other opportunities, or is reefing a big part of your life? Deciding on things like that may help you look at which path forward is best. I wish you the best of luck going forward. Take care!

Honestly, the biggest obstacle in getting out of the hobby is how much money I have invested in equipment. I have a Red Sea S-1000 g2 with just about every bell and whistle. I even had to hire a structural engineer and construction company to come reinforce the floor for me when I upgraded to this latest setup.

 

[Freddie83]

Overwhelmed by the responses and support, thank you so much to this amazing community.

 

[Reefer Matt]

Honestly, the biggest obstacle in getting out of the hobby is how much money I have invested in equipment. I have a Red Sea S-1000 g2 with just about every bell and whistle. I even had to hire a structural engineer and construction company to come reinforce the floor for me when I upgraded to this latest setup.

Yeah that can be a deterrent for sure. Another way to think about it imo is to ask yourself if you got your money’s worth of enjoyment from the tank. Instead of thinking of it as property, think of it as entertainment. If that value is still there for you, then maybe staying in reefing would be the best option. If not, then letting it all go at a good price to help a would-be Reefer may be the answer. In the end, we are all just tossing money into a bottomless pit. Some more than others of course.

 

[Seancj]

I'm sorry you are going through this! I can certainly empathize with your sadness and frustration. I've been through my share of total loss as well. One of the most painful crashes, I lost a very rare super bright true pastel blue, green, and pink teardrop maxima clam that I grew from 3" to 10". It was my prized reef possession for many years. When I saw it dead, I knew that I would never be able to replace it. That, in addition to another $8K worth of fish and corals. The tank was at the top of its game and while I was away on vacation, random power loss occurred for days with no one home. This was before the automation we have today that might have alerted me. I came home to the "smell"! I couldn't even comprehend starting over at that time. I sold everything off and I quite the hobby for a couple of years after that incident.
But, this hobby is in my blood and I came back, starting out small, and over time worked back up to a large volume system. This obsession started in me as a kid, and like you, has helped me through some tough times both as a distraction and a place of peaceful solitude.
Anyway, I highly recommend one of these, or something similar, with more wattage/power if your system needs it, to at least run your return pump during power outages. It has saved my reef once already. For $450, it's a great piece of mind. You plug it into the wall and plug your return pump into it. As its plugged in, it stays fully charged and bypasses power to your pump. When power goes out, it kicks in its batteries to run your pump. No need to do anything. When power comes back on, it charges itself while again bypassing power to your pump.

Anker SOLIX C1000 Portable Power Station, 1800W (Peak 2400W) Solar Generator, Full Charge in 58 Min, 1056wh LiFePO4 Battery for Home Backup, Power Outages, and Outdoor Camping (Optional Solar Panel)​

 

[gbroadbridge]

Feeling Defeated After 18 Years in the Hobby

I’ve been in the reefing hobby for roughly 18 years, and right now, I’m feeling like I’ve reached my breaking point. Over the years, I’ve poured my heart, soul, and a lot of money into my 265-gallon reef tank. From top-of-the-line LED lights, skimmers, wave-makers, chiller, reef mat, and battery backups, (you name it, I got it) to constantly staying on top of water parameters and upgrades, I’ve always tried to give my tank the best. But despite all my efforts, it feels like I’m losing this battle.

The recent hurricane that hit Georgia knocked out my power, and to my devastation, one of my battery backup failed when I needed it most. I’ve lost 80% of my fish and corals, including clownfish I’ve raised from fry for over 15 years. These were fish I watched hatch and grow. Losing them hit me harder than I expected.

I’ve gone through a lot in this hobby: just about any disease possible, mass fish losses, algae outbreaks, and even palytoxin poisoning that landed my family and me in the ER. But this… this is different. After all these years, it feels like no matter how much I invest and prepare— time, money, energy — there are still so many things out of my control. And it’s tough to come to terms with that. I've spent thousands on equipment that is simply not good. Reef mat motor broke after a few months, Apex Trident NP (I'm on my second one) that can't seem to measure Po4 correctly to save it's life, Eco Tech LEDS that can't manage to stay in sync with one another, eco tech battery back up that literally can't do the only job it has when the power goes out.

Now, I’m sitting here wondering if I still have it in me to keep going. I love this hobby, but the emotional and financial toll of this latest loss has left me feeling defeated. Has anyone else gone through something like this? How do you pick up the pieces and decide whether to rebuild or walk away? I’m genuinely torn and could really use some advice and perspective from those who understand the struggles.

Thanks for reading and for any guidance you can offer.

You lost your tank, but many others lost their entire homes with all possessions.

Some lost their lives.

Bad stuff happens.

You either roll with the punches and start over, or you take a break.

I can tell you that when something like this happened to me about 20 years ago, I shut down the tank and took a break for few years. I kept most of the tank stuff.

After that I came back to the hobby about 15 years ago, threw away a lot of the obsolete stuff I'd kept and started with a refreshed mind.

It was the best thing I could do mentally, as I was devastated by the losses at the time of the crash and would have resented all the work to get that tank back to where it was.

Only you know what it right for you.

 

[bobnicaragua]

I’m in DFW and lost my tank in the big freeze of 2021. I now have 2 back up generators.

 

[mythesis]

No advice here, only to send some compassion and sympathy from afar. Can't imagine what it feels like losing a tiny universe you've cultivated for almost 20 years.

 

[torombolo]

So sorry for you loss and hardship you and many are going trough. Sending prayers your way, only other thing I could say is remember the good times and don’t rush out.
I lived trough Maria in PR and can relate in some way.

 

[kamitera]

My condolences. My heart goes out to you. I hope you will find some kind of solace and comfort soon. It reminds me of when I quit beekeeping...they also die off en masse. It was no longer the right place and time for me to continue doing it. Well, five years later and some heavy gardening in between, I'm now getting into reef keeping.

This is nothing compared to what you went through, but I just went through a power outage today (not due to the hurricane but due to a 70 yr old circuit board that the landlord kept refusing to replace). I frantically went to Home Depot only to find that you can't run gas or propane generators inside an apartment lol, and that all solar generators were out of stock locally. Luckily, the water was changed yesterday so I had some time to figure out what to do next if the outage lasted longer than 24hrs. I was relieved that our nano 13.5 gal tank with 3 fish and a bunch of new corals were OK when the electrician finally showed up in the evening and fixed the situation.

I'm going to order a solar generator soon to prepare for future outages. With this said, no matther how prepared we are, all things come to an end and we have to live with that inevitable fact... Be well and may you eventually find solace in things that are eternal.

 

[BertS]

Feeling Defeated After 18 Years in the Hobby

I’ve been in the reefing hobby for roughly 18 years, and right now, I’m feeling like I’ve reached my breaking point. Over the years, I’ve poured my heart, soul, and a lot of money into my 265-gallon reef tank. From top-of-the-line LED lights, skimmers, wave-makers, chiller, reef mat, and battery backups, (you name it, I got it) to constantly staying on top of water parameters and upgrades, I’ve always tried to give my tank the best. But despite all my efforts, it feels like I’m losing this battle.

The recent hurricane that hit Georgia knocked out my power, and to my devastation, one of my battery backup failed when I needed it most. I’ve lost 80% of my fish and corals, including clownfish I’ve raised from fry for over 15 years. These were fish I watched hatch and grow. Losing them hit me harder than I expected.

I’ve gone through a lot in this hobby: just about any disease possible, mass fish losses, algae outbreaks, and even palytoxin poisoning that landed my family and me in the ER. But this… this is different. After all these years, it feels like no matter how much I invest and prepare— time, money, energy — there are still so many things out of my control. And it’s tough to come to terms with that. I've spent thousands on equipment that is simply not good. Reef mat motor broke after a few months, Apex Trident NP (I'm on my second one) that can't seem to measure Po4 correctly to save it's life, Eco Tech LEDS that can't manage to stay in sync with one another, eco tech battery back up that literally can't do the only job it has when the power goes out.

Now, I’m sitting here wondering if I still have it in me to keep going. I love this hobby, but the emotional and financial toll of this latest loss has left me feeling defeated. Has anyone else gone through something like this? How do you pick up the pieces and decide whether to rebuild or walk away? I’m genuinely torn and could really use some advice and perspective from those who understand the struggles.

Thanks for reading and for any guidance you can offer.

Dear Freddy83, I'm so sorry for your loss and hardship. I wouldn't know how to advise. There we try to take care for the wonders of nature and the same nature seem to punish with a different wonder.
Perhaps you could give me some advise.
I come from a tropical fresh water aquarium some 30 years ago and I am just about to fill up my 65 gallon Red Sea Reefer for the first time. I've set up a decent Sump with all equipment to it.
No living species yet. To me it has been very costly already to this moment.
In the Netherlands, where I live, there are no hurricanes or other life threatening wonders of nature so far.
My question to you Freddy83, would you advise me to skip the whole saltwater reefer challenge and keep it to a tropical freshwater aquarium? To make this into one of the most beautiful I could imagine, with sump and all equipment to it. Perhaps I live another 18 years, but I am hesitant to the challenge of so much trouble and costs coming next with my Reefer as planned. Perhaps better half-turned than completely gone astray.

 

[tigre44]

I bought a complete system yesterday from someone that had a total loss due to heater failure. I bought an inverter for backup I have not seen anyone suggest one of these but I believe it would give me several hours of backup. In the 11 yrs I have lived outside of Denver we have had only very short power failures my d cell air pump so far has kicked in and I had no problems. Since I’m retired I can catch issues pretty quickly however if I was working it would be a different story. I don’t trust the automated systems and probably couldn’t set one up anyway

 

[WillpoleReefers]

Feeling Defeated After 18 Years in the Hobby

I’ve been in the reefing hobby for roughly 18 years, and right now, I’m feeling like I’ve reached my breaking point. Over the years, I’ve poured my heart, soul, and a lot of money into my 265-gallon reef tank. From top-of-the-line LED lights, skimmers, wave-makers, chiller, reef mat, and battery backups, (you name it, I got it) to constantly staying on top of water parameters and upgrades, I’ve always tried to give my tank the best. But despite all my efforts, it feels like I’m losing this battle.

The recent hurricane that hit Georgia knocked out my power, and to my devastation, one of my battery backup failed when I needed it most. I’ve lost 80% of my fish and corals, including clownfish I’ve raised from fry for over 15 years. These were fish I watched hatch and grow. Losing them hit me harder than I expected.

I’ve gone through a lot in this hobby: just about any disease possible, mass fish losses, algae outbreaks, and even palytoxin poisoning that landed my family and me in the ER. But this… this is different. After all these years, it feels like no matter how much I invest and prepare— time, money, energy — there are still so many things out of my control. And it’s tough to come to terms with that. I've spent thousands on equipment that is simply not good. Reef mat motor broke after a few months, Apex Trident NP (I'm on my second one) that can't seem to measure Po4 correctly to save it's life, Eco Tech LEDS that can't manage to stay in sync with one another, eco tech battery back up that literally can't do the only job it has when the power goes out.

Now, I’m sitting here wondering if I still have it in me to keep going. I love this hobby, but the emotional and financial toll of this latest loss has left me feeling defeated. Has anyone else gone through something like this? How do you pick up the pieces and decide whether to rebuild or walk away? I’m genuinely torn and could really use some advice and perspective from those who understand the struggles.

Thanks for reading and for any guidance you can offer.

Very sorry to read this. Thinking about your loss with the tank and sending sympathy. For what it’s worth over my first year of a return to reefing I have realised that a majority of electronic equipment marketed into the hobby market is just not fit for purpose. Essentially pre-packaged landfill supplied in coloured cardboard boxes and sometimes having funky cases. Manufacturers here …I do mean a majority of you. To run a reef tank there has to be a good probability that a piece of equipment can run for years, not months as seems to happen, the application needs aerospace grade equipment. My own tank going forwards will have industrial automation components for level control,Victron power components etc etc. The amount of “aquarist” kit will diminish by the month. My thoughts on moving forwards for you here. Avoid aquarist focussed products where possible.

Steve

 

[MissMolly]

Just wanted to say that I'm sorry for your losses. No wonder you're feeling like that now. All the heart, time, energy and money that have gone into this tank of yours. I actually got tears in my eyes reading this. Just horrible

I know this feeling from my equestrian hobby. Injured horses worth over 50.000 dollars... More injured horses, nothing to ride on, just vet bills, everything just feels uphill. I then took a break for a few years. Just lost the spark completely and needed to not set foot in a staple.
Now I own 3 horses again - and I'm breeding them. I have found the joy again. Maybe this could happen for you too.

Maybe don't say "goodbye" but "See you again some day"?

 

[1970 lonereefer]

Thoughts are with you as I'm experiencing devastating loss for which I cannot find a cause. The financial part is sickening. Probably upwards of 20 grand for me. But as with you the loss of life is heartbreaking. I have been reefing since late 80s early 90s. My system is about 700 gallon. For me this hobby is part of who I am, as my wife says. So for me once the dust settles.i will continue on but on a much smaller scale. My thoughts are with you . Take your time.

 

[Dom]

Feeling Defeated After 18 Years in the Hobby

I’ve been in the reefing hobby for roughly 18 years, and right now, I’m feeling like I’ve reached my breaking point. Over the years, I’ve poured my heart, soul, and a lot of money into my 265-gallon reef tank. From top-of-the-line LED lights, skimmers, wave-makers, chiller, reef mat, and battery backups, (you name it, I got it) to constantly staying on top of water parameters and upgrades, I’ve always tried to give my tank the best. But despite all my efforts, it feels like I’m losing this battle.

The recent hurricane that hit Georgia knocked out my power, and to my devastation, one of my battery backup failed when I needed it most. I’ve lost 80% of my fish and corals, including clownfish I’ve raised from fry for over 15 years. These were fish I watched hatch and grow. Losing them hit me harder than I expected.

I’ve gone through a lot in this hobby: just about any disease possible, mass fish losses, algae outbreaks, and even palytoxin poisoning that landed my family and me in the ER. But this… this is different. After all these years, it feels like no matter how much I invest and prepare— time, money, energy — there are still so many things out of my control. And it’s tough to come to terms with that. I've spent thousands on equipment that is simply not good. Reef mat motor broke after a few months, Apex Trident NP (I'm on my second one) that can't seem to measure Po4 correctly to save it's life, Eco Tech LEDS that can't manage to stay in sync with one another, eco tech battery back up that literally can't do the only job it has when the power goes out.

Now, I’m sitting here wondering if I still have it in me to keep going. I love this hobby, but the emotional and financial toll of this latest loss has left me feeling defeated. Has anyone else gone through something like this? How do you pick up the pieces and decide whether to rebuild or walk away? I’m genuinely torn and could really use some advice and perspective from those who understand the struggles.

Thanks for reading and for any guidance you can offer.

In this hobby, you often read that "bigger is better". This isn't always the case and you may be an exception to the "bigger is better" rule.

I've been in the hobby for about 20 years myself. And my frustration was always that my tanks would survive, yet never thrive.

My best results come when doing faithful 20% water changes on a weekly basis. I relied on the new water to replenish elements consumed by the tank. But when I set up a 125 gallon tank (145 total capacity), water changes became impractical to do on a weekly basis. So I turned to dosing, and everything went sideways.

Dosing manually didn't work and resulted in such a mess of my water chemistry, that I temporarily moved everything back to smaller tanks and started over. This time, I set up drip dosing and again, everything went sideways.

Now I have deployed a system which has 4 dosing heads. And while it seemed to help, everything went sideways again, only it took a bit longer.

So I have returned to water changes, doing a swap of 30 gallons every 10 days. I just keep my mixing station out of the way and use a utility pump to make new water. Then I connect a hose and pump it into the tank.

In the end, I would suggest keeping it simple. It seems that you have a lot of technology deployed on your tank. And the more you have on the tank, the more difficult it can make things.

Lets look at your battery backup situation. This is money well spent. But you can't "set it and forget it". You have to test your backup systems.

Personally, I think roller mat systems are a huge waste of money. They run about $500. And I've seen a new roll of fleece go for between $35-$45. I use white felt sheets in my media tray, which gets swapped out during weekly husbandry. I pay 5 cents per sheet.

If you choose to stay in the hobby, I would suggest scaling back and keep things simple.

The complexity of your system seems to be a source of stress, so simplify.

 

[Erokster73]

It's horrible , but give it a few days or a week and maybe look at it as a chance to do it again but different. No matter how great someone life is they almost always still have things they would to have done different. You will still have the memories and photos.

 

[jaayy]

Yes, actually I have. I had so many show size fish that I think having schools of little fish in such a large aquarium would be fun and different, definitely going to give it several weeks before I decide what to do.

Great! I’m rooting for you.

 

[timmyrules]

Freddie, I am so sorry this happened to you, unfortunately I don’t have any similar experiences…or any advice. Just chiming in to give my condolences.

 

[TBSB2019]

Prayers go out to you and your family. This is something we worry about every year being just south of Tampa and within a rocks throw of Terra Ceia Bay. We invested in a generator from the get go. I would be devastated. Keep your head up and do what makes you happy. I don't even know what else to say..........